By Monaliza Esteban
 |
| Monaliza (in white) with the women of Meheramul Khirpur village, Badin Parish. |
LM Monaliza Esteban from Baguio City shares how the lockdown in
Pakistan where she is currently assigned invited her to learn new things and made
her realize that God has dug out a strength in her which she never knew she had
if not for the lockdown. She
continues to trust that God will always
be in command whatever lies ahead of this pandemic.
First Month
Lockdown
kicked off in Karachi, Pakistan on March 23, two weeks before the end of our Urdu language
classes. The whole area where we were was in total silence which was very
unusual. We don’t get this kind of silence during ordinary days. The only usual
sound left was the call to prayer for our Muslim brothers and sisters which at one
time I felt was a very sad voice. I took that initial lockdown time to rest
from our language studies and do some stuff. My first month gave me the feeling
of being in solitude. Spiritually I was enthusiastic and faithful to the
schedule that I set up. The feeling of being alone with God was a moment of
grace and joy. From time to time I
received voice or video calls from my friends and family around the globe. Thanks
to the internet communication is possible. It made us updated and felt closer
to each other. I remember towards the end of March one of my family members had
to go back to her work place abroad. The
fear and worries my family had to go through was really bizarre. I felt the
effect of this pandemic emotionally when we started sharing our fears which I
didn’t feel during the first few months the news erupted.
Second
Month
Towards
the second month of this lockdown I started to feel strange. I think the
feeling of boredom struck me. “What am I supposed to do now?” There’s nothing to do even if there are things
to be done. “When will I go to my ministry?” These were the strange questions
that bombarded my mind those days. But seeing the people’s situation and
watching the news, I felt we were all on the same boat but perhaps in a different
kind of boat. So I thought to myself, ‘why should I allow these things to
stress me? Should I be doing something that I can benefit from?‘ So like others,
I started to do some new things. Sewing doormats from recycled materials for my
room was encouraging. I befriended the
kitchen and it welcomed me when I least expected it. It gave me a foretaste of being
a baker. Because we are fond of eating pickles or achara, I also did not hesitate to make some. My heart leapt with joy with all
the new things I learned during this pandemic. God dug out things from us that we never imagined
we have and can. I was at peace with those feelings through these new
activities.
Time
to move on
Moving
into the interior part of Sindh after the lockdown was a good decision. I was greeted
with the super summer heat upon arrival. While others were taking precautions against this pandemic, here I was struggling with the heat. I
wondered how people coped with this kind of heat alongside the government’s safety
measures on this covid-19.
I
then started my visitation to the villages. Receiving the hands of these
village people was irresistible. I don’t know why, but things just happened
whenever I meet them. It made me remember the story of Jesus with the lepers. Through
him, I should always gaze through people’s heart because the surface is not
always the manifestation of the whole person regarding his/her condition. Should
I know who’s carrying the virus, things would be different.
While
I continue to face the effects of this pandemic, I am grateful to the positive
effects it brought to the people especially me. The natural humanitarian attitude
towards each other surfaced. It made me
more trusting that hope is always present amidst this crisis. I kept thanking God and trusting that whatever
is ahead of us He will always be in command of everything. Indeed, today’s
wineskin is a call for a change of heart.
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